SNEK INBOX

[hardpity]

[ for texts and voice messages or whatever ]

Comments

[righteel]

Hmmm…do we believably seem like we could be betrothed?

[hardpity]

I dunno, maybe? We wouldn't be a weirder couple than my parents.

[righteel]

Well...husband WOULD trump boyfriends and friends as far as protection goes...

[hardpity]

You'd get Ortho as a little brother in-law too.

[righteel]

You make an excellent point.

[hardpity]

I'd jokingly croon my net worth but I think that's too likely to actually seduce you.

[righteel]

I calculated it myself not long after we found out exactly who you are as an exercise in my spare time. The research was rather interesting...obviously there was not much in regards to readily available figures or information, so I had to work with comparables and projections, but I think I was able to get rather close.

[hardpity]

[ AZUL.... bursts out laughing dsfkgljfd perfect capitalism octopus. soothing. healing ]

[righteel]

Hence, I will proceed to both croon and swoon on your behalf.

"Ooooh, Mr.Shroud~! What a big net worth you have~!"

[hardpity]

[ WHEEZE laughs until he has a coughing fit then has to take a minute to collect himself but #noregrets #stanazulashengrotto ]

[righteel]

If I have to eat flesh, it had better be worth at least seven figures per pound.

[hardpity]

I'm a traditionalist too, so no eating before marriage.

[righteel]

Ah, of course. I should have expected, but....are aperitifs allowed? Hors d'oeuvres?

[hardpity]

Before we were retroactively betrothed, my fiance told me 'don't offer to let anyone eat you, not even me, not even a little'.

[righteel]

Of course. Threatening to eat someone before you are betrothed is just indecent.

[hardpity]

Kyaa~ and I'm so shy~

[righteel]

[Okay, cracking up]

You? Shy? Never!

[hardpity]

I'm a blushing maiden!!

[righteel]

As pure as fallen snow, I’m sure.

[hardpity]

Like an ice sculpture.

[righteel]

And only true love could warm your icy heart.

[hardpity]

Right! Only true love's kiss can thaw it!

[righteel]

Does that also wait until after marriage?

[hardpity]

Traditionally it would go first, right?

[righteel]

Indecent.